Christian Formation and Deliberation
Why do we experience conflict? Why do our communities tend toward polarization rather than unity?
From our Christian tradition, the main answer to these questions tells us that we experience conflict and polarization because we deeply misunderstand our relation to God and to our neighbor.
First Misperception
Our first misperception is that the purpose of life is to be comfortable. It is not. Our culture tells us we should be comfortable and satisfied at all times. Our Christian message, on the other hand, tells us that life is entirely uncomfortable, and part of this discomfort is due to conflict in our lives.
Second Misperception
Our second misperception is that we view conflict in a negative way. We tend to understand conflict as troubling and disturbing…uncomfortable. The reality is that conflict can be a positive when we face some of our discomforts. It generates new insights and creativity. Jesus knew this, and if we pay close attention, we will see that he is engaged in conflict a lot. In fact, he is very rarely agreeable. He is confrontational with many people during his ministry, and his approach (or model) for engaging conflict is to be direct, clear, and compassionate with those around him.
Third Misperception
Our third misperception is that we believe we are somehow separate from all “those people” we disagree with, and we live our lives believing we are a fixed, independent, individualized identity. Again, culture tells us this is true, but our own Christian message strongly disagrees. Jesus tells us that we should not be focused on the kingdom of the self but, instead, should pursue a vision where we are all a part of the kingdom of God, a beloved community of pilgrims on a journey together. He tells us that we are each other’s harvest.
Fourth Misperception
Our fourth misperception is that short term relief will somehow offer us long term resolution, but planting seeds of generous and compassionate communication does not happen when we pursue short term relief. Short term relief is our default mode of finding distractions, addictions, and false resolutions, but none of these things lead to long term resolution or true love or care for others.
Formation 